Nakita Grinie

I May Have Lost My Mind

Ok, so here is the thing.....

I diligently spent all week working on this fantastic piece of analytic writing to present to you on Gamergate and the presence of male aggression. I have been very busy fact checking everything and making sure all my edits are grammatically correct.....then I actually re-read it and realized, "Holy Crap! I can't publish that!! I will be crucified on sight, or site....no, I think it is on sight... anyway...no self-respecting women's rights proponent can write what I just wrote and live to tell the tale. I have to do something else."

So, here it is Friday and I have nothing to offer up to you except the promise that maybe I can temper my insanity enough by NEXT Friday to be able to present this article I worked so hard on. Hopefully in a much more sane manner. Don't get me wrong, I totally believe in what I wrote, but let's just say it is not yet palatable for normal human viewers yet. Also, I need The Husband to read it because it is about gaming and if he is passionate about anything else in life (besides me and the kids) it is about gaming. I am not joking. He actually belongs to a group that lobbies political entities for various reasons to balance freedom of speech with responsibility in video games....or some such nonsense. He gets really, really into it, which is the main reason I wrote the article in the first place.

We were laying in bed earlier this week and he was watching some news story on the Gamergate phenomenon. Being genuinely checked out of the video game community (primarily from disinterest) I had to inquire what on earth they were talking about.

As an aside, I actually like playing video games. And I really like my husband. What I don't really understand is the passion for the industry that would require someone to join a group that lobbies on behalf of them....or, for that matter the level of dedication that would cause people to issue death threats because of video games (you will understand more after my original post is published if you aren't already familiar with it). But, in all fairness I never understood the soccer...or football player who shot people after losing, or the whole idea that the highest incidence of domestic violence occurs after the Super Bowl. I don't actually know if that is true, but it has been said often enough for me to assume some truth to it, and either way, it makes a good illustration of how I totally don't get that level of passion for a game.

Sorry, back to topic.

After hearing his very, very detailed explanation of everything involved I sat up in bed and declared, "What a great topic for my blog!!" I then questioned him extensively before going to sleep. I began work on it almost immediately the next morning. I was excited to share my deep, and potentially brilliant revelations on the whole thing. After I finished though, I realized there are some truths that are just too hard to swallow. And there are some truths that make you sound like a woman-hating maniac, or in other words I sort of forgot to add the whole "spoon full of sugar to help the medicine go down" and thus I left myself looking like a raving lunatic, and possibly the new enemy for all women-kind. So, you are getting this rambling diatribe instead.

I think perhaps I may write what would be a potentially appropriate companion piece to the Gamergate discussion first. It is a post that has actually been heavy on my mind for a long, long time. I was planning on writing it two years ago before I took my hiatus. The problem is, and the reason I haven't written it yet, is that I am afraid it may make me a terribly unlikable person. After all, I may live by brutal honesty about myself, but sometimes polite exchanges are there to maintain a certain level of social civility. I am afraid that if I admit the truth I might be crucified for that as well.....

Now that I write this, I am thinking I WILL go ahead and write that article.... Look for true confessions of the heart next week. And also a spectacularly offensive article on Gamergate. After all, we aren't anything if we aren't true to ourselves, right?

With that, I wish you all a wonderful weekend full of warm fuzzy family moments. I hope you are feeling so warm and fuzzy by Monday that you are willing to look past the insanity I will present to you next week and continue to stick with me.