Showing posts with label my. Show all posts
Showing posts with label my. Show all posts
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
My Prediction on How Stressful Three Kids Will Be
I'm sure a lot of you have read this article by now, as I've seen it circulate through Facebook a few times. Apparently Today.com surveyed over 7,000 US moms and the results tell us that moms with three kids are more stressed out that moms with four kids. Here is an interesting quote:
"The study found that while transitioning from two to three children is overwhelming for parents because it means they are outnumbered, mothers tend to 'let go' once they reach four children."
So they are saying we need to have four kids to 'let go' and be less stressed? I'm sorry, but I don't buy it. I realize that I don't actually have three kids yet and maybe I will eat my words some day, but I can assure you that I'm not going into this assuming it will be easy. There will be stress, sure. There was also stress as a new mom to my only child. And again when we transitioned to two children. I understand that having three kids means you are 'outnumbered' and the defense switches from man on man to zone. Three kids means a lot of 'needs' that will rest squarely on my shoulders (and my husband's, and our 'village' that is here along with us). But my bottom line is that how can one generalize to say that 'three kids is the hardest number' when there are so many unique factors to consider?
Doesn't it depend on the kid? I hear that there are mythical babies out there who sleep through the night at 6 weeks. I simply cannot imagine what life would be like to get solid sleep before the year mark of a baby's life. Some babies have colic, some babies are seriously ill, some are needy and have 'intense' personalities. Some don't sleep (mine). Some babies are really challenging when it comes to getting them to eat and gain wait. Let's say you have one of these difficult personality traits in a baby, but he's your first child. Don't you think that this mom would say that 'ONE CHILD IS SO HARD!' ? Or what if you have an 'easy' baby the first time around and then payback comes with number two? Pretty sure that mom would say, 'HOLY COW, HAVING TWO KIDS IS STRESSFUL!' And that is ok! Mad props to all moms with any number of children, no matter how easy or hard they may be. It's hard and it's different and it's also wonderful, if you ask me. I think it's more about each individual child and their challenges versus some 'critical mass' number of children that is 'hardest'. Isn't the concept of stress a thing that is in the eye of the beholder? It's really very subjective and personal.
This brings up a thought that has been swirling in my head for a bit, one that I might also mention in an upcoming blog post about the 'best advice' I've received. I believe that people are as happy as they make their minds up to be---a quote I've had written in my high school 'quote book' for years now. Some people will be miserable and negative and stressed and will try to bring other people down along with them with their complaints. And trust me, we ALL have those moments---but I'm talking about the general mindset of people, not just a bad day here or there. There are simply the 'woe is me' people of the world who never seem to snap out of it, right?
I also think that some of the most positive, optimistic, and laid back people in the world also happen to have intense challenges in their lives. They have major stresses, too. But it's all in how you handle it. Have you noticed that those who are dealt really crappy cards in life (cancer, the loss of a loved one, serious illness in the family, financial difficulties, etc. ) can also be the ones that seem to handle it with grace? I guess it's one of the times when the cliche 'God won't give you more than you can handle' rings true. Again, I'm not saying that anyone with heartbreaking circumstances doesn't deserve to complain and feel badly about their situation. They do! But I also believe we can control our reaction to events, but we cannot control what happens to us in life.
Why can't we make a conscious decision, as mothers with three children, to 'let go' right now? Why does it have to take a fourth child to learn that lesson? The article clearly states that mothers stress more about the pressure they put on themselves versus the pressure they feel from others. Isn't that another can of worms in the world of moms? I think we are all our own worst critics.
Maybe those 7,000 moms who were interviewed for the survey are right in that three kids is the 'most stressful' number. But I just don't agree with generalizing that ALL moms of three kids are the 'most stressed' moms. I think it depends on the mom and the kids and all of the complex circumstances around their lives.
So my prediction on how stressful three kids will be for me? No clue. Probably hard but not impossible. It depends on what type of child we are given this time around, so what is the point of speculating before it happens? There will be an adjustment period, a learning curve, some low points and hopefully even more high points of having three children. I can't promise that I'll never be stressed out or have my whiny posts on this blog at times, but I can promise to focus on the positive as much as humanly possible. I realize how quickly these little kid years will pass, I realize how blessed we are to have two-going-on-three kids. The other day-to-day stresses in life really need to take a back burner to the bigger picture of priorities. Less stress. More laughter and sarcasm.
There will be wine at that point, too, which will surely help;) Maybe those 7,000 moms aren't big drinkers?
Time to insert a random picture of my kids that must be included in a post with so many words. The caption: I 'only' have two kids right now so I should save all of my stress for when there is another one of these guys posing for the camera, I guess. My kids are not perfect and definitely have their challenging STRESSFUL moments…but they sure are cute;) Plus, Nate says we are NOT having four so I better get used to the stress level of three at some point!
Sunday, July 23, 2017
Potty training my 3 1/2 year old boy
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Thursday, June 15, 2017
Aug 27 My Little Punk
Me: "Truman, I want to surprise daddy with an iPad for his birthday this year. It's something he's wanted for a long time and I think he will be super excited to open this special gift from us." (Also, I have to redeem myself from last year's gift of new bed sheets. #fail)
T: "Can I tell daddy he is getting a present from us?"
Me: "Sure, but please don't spoil the surprise about it being an iPad. Then we will have to think of something else for him, because I really want it to be a surprise this year."
T: (as Nate walked in for his part of bedtime songs) "Daddy, we are going to get you an----(Nate slams his hand over T's mouth). An---(same thing as before). We are going to get you something GoGo has."
Awesome, he's totally going to give it away. But I walk out after telling T to please not tell our secret. I know we are doomed at this point and my awesome idea will be a total let down.
Nate then came downstairs to say that during his nightly rendition of 'Twinkle Twinkle', Truman simply sang the word 'iPad' over and over again.....in perfect pitch to the song, right along with Nate's real lyrics.
Sweet.
Lesson learned: Never trust a three year old with a secret. Duh.
Do not blame Monkey, Truman. This one is all you ;)
Tuesday, May 23, 2017
If I may illustrate my point
Just when I began to worry that I hadn't made my point strongly enough, the following map made its way to the internet. The image and accompanying article illustrate my point very succinctly that we have a woefully pathetic system of support after birth for parents in this country. Even more so when you compare them to other industrialized nations.
Saturday, May 6, 2017
Popular Potty training my 2 yr old boy
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Monday, April 10, 2017
How my mom made us a bajillion Roman shades
My mom is the bomb, you guys. She offered to help me make curtains, a bedskirt, a changing pad cover, and a quilt for baby girl. And after she did all that I somehow convinced her to continue making Roman shades until she was blue in the face. Not really, but man---I am SO glad I didn't have to make these by myself. It's not that they are particularly difficult or require a lot of skill but I guess I just don't have the patience for these types of projects. Set me up in a room and I'll paint walls all day long. I'll paint canvases and cribs and shop and decorate. But anything that remotely resembles sewing (which, this tutorial doesn't even require THAT) and I go bonkers.
So I sent her a few Pinterest links and this one was the main site she used to make the shades. But she did change a few things around and the instructions she sent me are VERY detailed. As in, I should really try to make the final Roman shade we want in our upper bathroom. But it's just so darn easy to let the pro do it, you know (wink, wink, mom).
I knew I wanted the shade to be mounted inside our window frames because, well, I am really into staring at the WHITE paint that I so meticulously slaved over for so long. I really like the look of an inside mount more than putting the shade on the outside of the wood/window area, too. So my only duty (besides buying the fabric) was to measure each window and buy the mini blinds. We measured from the inside of each window and found really cheap blinds for about $4 a pop at Menards. My mom somehow calculated how much fabric we would need per window treatment and that is how I purchased the fabrics of my choice. I believe for a window that is 29.5 inches wide, and 54 inches long we needed 1 5/8 yards. Not sure if that helps at all. I am SO bad with calculating inches to yards---probably another reason I am not into sewing right now.
Let's look at some 'real time' pictures just to get you pumped up for this project, shall we?
The Kitchen shades:
Truman's shades:
Baby girl's shades:
(they aren't usually this wrinkled when let down, but I ALWAYS have them up in baby girl's room)
Are you ready to make them? I just copy and pasted my mom's email to me into this post, so if the alignment and font seem weird, that is why. Not sure why her pictures don't always show up either---I see them in my blogger preview, but not when I view the actual blog. Oh, well. Enjoy!
Supplies needed:
-mini blind
-Fabric and liner (Medium weight fabric makes a nicer shade than thinner fabric, may not need a liner if you don't care about blocking out all of the sun. We used the liner in the kids rooms but skipped them in the kitchen and family room)
-cans or pins
-wax paper
-fabric glue,
-brush,
-Ruler,
-tape measure,
-cutters to clip off the hook,
-pencil,
-sharpie,
-scissors,
-heat n bond if you line the shades,
-iron,
-rotary cutter/cutting board/rotary guide.
Roman Shades made from Mini Blinds: by Julia's mom, Pam
- Determine the size mini blind you will use.
- Remove the 3 round little stoppers on the bottom big slat. Untie the knots.
- Lay out the mini blind. Clip the 3 ladders being extremely careful not to cut the larger cord inside two of the ladders.
- Remove all of the slats.
- Clip off the hook on the top header
- Glue 10 slats together (to be used as a bottom weight later). Then glue 4 (or how many slats you determine you will need) additional sets of 3 slats together. You end up with one stack of 10 glued together and 4 stacks of three. (The vinyl slats are thin and this helps reinforce them).
- Determine the FINISHED size of your curtain. Add 3 inches to width and 3 inches to length for dimensions to cut fabric.
- Cut out the fabric
- Divide the FINISHED length by the number of slats you want to use ( Our finished length was 53 inches so we divide 53 by 4 slats and got 10.6 inches between all 4 slates). There is a calculator that might be helpful at http://www.terrelldesigns.com/Instructions
- Iron the fabric to get out any wrinkles and the center fold line. I used spray water and steam iron.
- Draw lines 1 ½ inches from the side edges of fabric.
- Iron the sides along the lining line you drew on the fabric and then turn under the side ¼ inch and iron. (These pictures are taken with shades lined)
- Brush on glue, turn under ¼ inch. Brush on glue and fold along line and glue onto the lining. Avoid over brushing an area. This makes the fabric stretch and pucker.
- Place the top header along a line you draw one inch from the top of the fabric. Center and mark edges. (Picture is of lining along the top drawn line with a notch cut out for area NOT to be glued)
- Glue header to fabric using the line as a guide. Leave the ends unglued. After you install the shades you will glue (or Velcro) these ends in place.
- Use the measurement you got in #8. On the wrong side of the fabric, measure from the top of the header to the top of the first slat. Center, mark edges, the top and bottom of this slat with a pencil (I just drew all the way around the slat). Measure the top of this first slat to the top of the next slat and mark on both sides of the slat. Continue for all slats. (Better to mess up on the drawn lines than the glued down slates. See my drawn and messed up, erased markings)
- String on the slats. String on the stack of 10 slats and finally string on the thicker bottom slat. Glue the stack of 10 onto the bottom thick slat. Make sure you keep glue away from the strings. I put a heavy book on it to hold it down while it dried.
- Pull the strings so that they are straight – not really tight – but no slack in them. With a sharpy or pen mark where the string just comes out from the stack of slats.
- Raise the bottom heavy slat up the string so you can tie a knot so that the mark still shows. Measure & mark finished length from the top of the header to make sure you have the right length. Run a line of glue along the line at the bottom heavy slat. Replace the bottom heavy slat along the glue line and put cans in place to hold the slat in place while it dries.
- Now you glue the slats into place. After some experimentation I think it is best to put the glue on the rounded side of the slat, brush on the glue on smoothly. Using wax paper under the slat so you can get glue all the way to the edges. Stay 1 inch away from the strings on either side. The glue can not get on the string or you can’t raise and lower the shade.
- Flip the slat over to glue into place inside the drawing of the slat. Finger press along the edges to set the glue and make sure fabric is making good contact with the entire face of the slat. I sort of pulled the fabric so that contact could be made with the entire surface. If you just lay it flat, then it will only adhere to the middle and not the edges of the slat. This will help make a crisp inside fold.
- Cut off the extra string at the bottom and tuck the extra up inside the little holes.
23. Brush glue onto the fabric that is below the bottom heavy slat and wrap fabric around the heavy bottom slat, making sure it is smooth. It gives it a nice finished look.
- I let it dry for several hours before I tried to pull the cord and see how it would fold.
- Pull the cord and play with the folds and help them to make crisp lines in the back of the shade along the edge of the slat before you install. I left the outside folds softer for a more rounded look in front.
26. Then we decided that the shade worked a lot better if the string came down the front of the shade instead of the back. Actually Nate figured this out. So now, cut around the pully opening on the header and pull the strings through to the front.
- Cut a strip of fabric for the top loop that will hide the pully opening. Measure the same width as you did for your unfinished shade. The length is the exact measurement that you placed between each slate. Mark 1 ½ inches on each side just like you did to the shade. Fold in, iron and glue like you did in #11, #12 & #13 to the shade.
- Run a line of glue along one long edge and fold, gluing the edges together.
- Now you are ready to glue this “loop” of fabric to the top header of your shade.
- Run a line of glue along the top of the header like you did in #15. Leave the ends unglued so you can install the shade. You can glue or Velcro these ends in place once they are installed.
Taa Daa -- A Roman Shade:) Whew.
HOW TO MAKE THE LINER:
We lined some of the blinds with “block out” lining. It made for a more substantial shade. If you want to line the shade:
- Cut lining to be the exact size of your finished shade. Place the lining on the wrong side of the fabric. Leave 1 inch at the top, 2 inches at the bottom and 1 ½ inches on each side. Mark around the lining.
- Insert this step now before you glue #13 edges in place.
Use Heat N Bond tape and run it along the top of the line you draw for the slat in #16. Iron on per directions of tape. Use a pressing cloth.
Do this for each slat. You will want to re-draw your slat lines onto the lining now.
This step adheres the fabric to the lining so that it acts as one piece of fabric from here on out.
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Does this seem easy to you? Go for it and let me know how it turns out?? I'll patiently wait for the final 3 shades to arrive at my doorstep once my mom finishes them back in Missouri. Spoiled? Yes, I am.
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